I panic. A lot sometimes. But in such a fashion that nobody really knows it’s happening. I keep it in my head where it won’t bother anybody else. Because my panic usually has nothing to do with other people and it takes me about five minutes to talk myself out of it. Pretty simple.
I had such a moment about an hour or so ago and it concerned my novel. It suddenly, and irrationally, hit me that a scene just past the middle of it would make the perfect ending. This wasn’t really what made me panic. What made me almost cower in near dysfunction was that if I’d decided to move that scene to the end of my story, I would have to basically rewrite the entire thing from where I’d removed the scene. I’m not willing to do that. I like the story the way it is at the moment and it basically challenges me into thinking of a better end. So the panic is really a good thing, it keeps me motivated and encourages me to think instead of waiting to see what will happen. I’ve got the definite end scene set but my characters are surprising me with the directions they want to go in. I’m keeping them on a tight leash though.
The only other thing that might worry me, but only a little, is my word count. I initially decided to set it at 80k – 85k then moved it up to 90k. Judging by how many words I’m pounding out and how much still needs to happen I’m thinking I’ll pass the 90k mark. But not to worry. I’ve reached the stage in my novel where it literally keeps me awake at night, usually two or three hours, so I’ll have loads of time to decide what should go. Probably not the best thing because sleep deprivation puts me in a real testy mood the following day. Luckily the first thing I do when we appoint new people is warn them I’m not a morning person.
Then of course I find little gems like this photo below. It instigates wonderful conversations and makes me feel so much better. Yes, the big red circle indicates the name of a building/complex in the city. Have a chuckle, I did.